Hardtail? Hardcore? Hardly…
Sunday, July 11, 2004
OK. This has little to do with where I am, but how I am getting there…
Before I left, Scot Harrel and Scott Kennerly mentioned that they saw a show about these guys building custom choppers and riding a few hundred miles to test them and compete for whatever it is chopper riders get excited about.
And I ended up seeing part of a rerun of the show while cooling off in a no-name motel (my favorites…) somewhere a few hundred miles back.
Anyway, for Scot and Scott, I’d like to go over the many ways these supposedly bad-ass riders have nothing on anyone who dares ride a bicycle along the same routes and further:
- So they ride “hardtails” (bikes with no rear shocks). That’s about all we on bicycles ride out here so what’s the big deal? And we’re not riding on a big, wide cushy seat. Put a bike seat on a chopper, no shocks and let’s see how far they can ride.
- They’re riding on big, fat, soft tires. A few miles balancing on less than 1″ of hard, high pressure tires and they’d be off to the nearest bar stool for the rest of the day.
- They actually get an entire lane to themselves! We get the shoulder – basically “road scraps” – the part of the road that nobody wants and where everyone’s unwanted crap goes – tires, bottles, fenders, cans, sticks, road kill and worse. And that is if we are lucky – half the time we have nothing but a few inches and a prayer that the maniac revving up behind us just might move over enough not to hit us… The day I see these guys squeezing into the foot and a half of trashed nothing that we get then they can talk about rough rides.
- Big hill coming up? Oh wow… They turn their right wrist another quarter turn and up you go. Pound for pound, you know Lance Armstrong has more strength than any of them.
- Traveling far? Carrying gear? Water? Unlike us, they get to drop it in the riveted black leather saddle bags and think nothing of weight to value – after all the bike’s doing the work!
- Not sure where you are sleeping but it’s getting dark? They flip on the headlight on and nail it – the next town (30, even 50 miles away…) is only a few minutes away. For us it is half a good day’s ride and suicide to ride at night!
- Get run off the road? Right. When was the last time you saw a family in a RV get even close to a big dude, on a Harley, wearing black, showing colors? Let’s just say they get all the room they need and we are, at best, nothing to think about; at worst, a fun distraction to scare and laugh about for a few miles…
So Scot and Scott…. Even though I’ll give biker dudes every bar fight they might get into, I just thought I would set the record straight – you want the toughest riders out there on the road? Check out the next person you see packing it all on a bicycle, climbing that 10% grade, edging along the shoulder, balancing on two skinny little tires…. That’s hardcore!